The Keg PK
for VP External

1. The fees are fine, but not nearly enough money is being spent on alcohol. E.g., a lot is being spent on a medical/dental program, that could be used to throw some bitchin' beer gardens. Imagine the parties that could happen if the students fees were used to used to buy kegs of beer. Do students really want the current AMS programs? NO!!! Admit it, we are here to drink.

Admittedly, spending all the money on booze could be excessive. Therefor, I think the remainder of the money should be spent on an extensive program to ban all protesters from UBC. All they do is waste time and energy, and use up valuable space in this paper, space that could be better used for Crown Royal ads.

2. I think that the executives do not deserve to be paid (including me). What do they really do? There should be a nominal allowance so they can all have well stocked beer fridges, and that is all. Further, any program that does not relate to drinking can be torched (Safewalk can stay, drunk first-year girls need a way home). Finally, In order to save money, we need more corporate sponsorship. Do you really care if your class is in Microsoft Theater instead of Hebb if it saves you $20 a year. That is one more case of beer. Fuck it, I know I am a strong enough person that my views are not randomly changed by attending class in Ford Hall.

3. OK, this is a no-brainer. MORE BOOZE. At the end of the year if the AMS has a surplus, lets have the Go Home Barbecue. Drinks are "15 apiece, and if your glass is the size of a fish bowl, it gets FILLED, none of this halfway crap.

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